Ok so welcome back...I am Lauren and this is Allie and we are the CEO(s) of evil incorporated Lauren and Allie style"the way evil should be" if you have been hiding under a rock for the past few updates lets review friday is evil reminder day and wednesday is scheming day!!!!!! So unless you forgot it is time to......dun dun dunnnn drum roll please???? no wait I am yuor supreme ruler I dont need to say pleas in order to get my drum roll so I command that you give me a drum roll right now!!!!!! ok so there was the drum roll finally...its time for take over the world week and lets hope that your not allergic to teh color blue because for one that is the color of this font oops and it is the color the world will soon be.....mwhaha
todays target: YOU (just kidding) EVERYONE hahahahahahaha
PLAN this is a really long open so dont read if
you dont have time to laugh at our funniness and if you are in the middle of a battle with a lightsaber ooohhh pretty lights I have always wanted a blue one
also do not read if you are supposed ot eb correcting papers or doing something productive
or if you are feeling in denial of yoou evilness we cannot have that okey dokey lets begin
Plan- Blue Jello exists right? right.... Evil blue jello exists right? WRONG up unitl now there has been no such record of evil blue jello i evn gooogled it and nothing has been copyrighted but who cares about copyrights anyway we own the world right? wrong the correct answer would be Lauren and allie cna break copyrights (in this fantasy world of ours) anytime they want and you guys have to follow by our imaginary copyright or face our eviltude ness!!!!!!!!ok so since there is no such thing as evil blue jello we have taken it into our hands to make some ourselves...it serves the entire world and is sold seperately from the supplies to make it we cannot having you try to overthrow us right???worng that is exactly what we want we only want to rule the word for one week because we have to come up with a new plan a week so if we r to busy ruling the world we cannot update darn!!!!!
so we will use a chemical that was developed in Lauren and Allie Evil Labrotories. OS we will be making blue jello by injecting the blue ice chemical into flavorless glob .
ICE is intended for evil purpouses this does not and will never give you any excuse to inject it into
a rabid dog
you grandma
the president
a neighborhood bully
the ice cream man
a grizzly bear
your annoying cousin *cough* jacob*cough*
a random horseshoe crab
your moms homeade pie
santa claus
the tooth fairy
the easter bunny
you may however inject it into
Santas reindeer
Caitlin(you know who you are)
steve killer
mr P.
and any other random passer by
So th eside affects yay the best part of being injected witht his stuff
you turn blue duh!!!!!!!
death
headaches
paralysis
constant denial ooooo ull neve rbe able to accept anything ever again
giddy-ness kinda like after you drink rum but without the hangover haha(not that either of us ahve ever drank rum really but Pirates of teh Carribean gives us some goood mental pics)
hyper ness YAY
the urge to sing and or be random(if you're going to sing sing xmas songs they're the best and if yoou're going to be random the one phrase that cna always win a random contest is this happpy christmas welcome to the cumberland county civic center here is your 29 cans of fancy feast catfood your opponent will be too busy trying to figure out what drug you're on to reply so you will win by default yay!!!)
flying
the urge to jump off a building
and some other stuff it hasnt been tested on pregnant people or people with a serious medical condtion so you dont have to ask your doctor first because they won't know!!!!!!!!1
So when the blue jello is done we will flood the world I will tell you how we made it momentarily...
so when the blue jelloo has flodded the world it will turn everything blue
everything and it will get pretty tiring sitting and looking at blue all day so we will be sending everyone sunglasses with colorfully tinted lenses so you wont always be looking at blue I know I am a genius!!!!!! I think it would suck for you if you hate the color blue how depressing
in order to make the blue jello we will be filling th egrand canyon and great basin located in the United States and then add water the end...ok so in order to stir it we will get some giat red wood trees even though thery are endagered who cares and use them to stir we will ahve a huge robotic pair of hand and someone will wear a huge pair of interactive glovesa nd the hand will do all the work and stir the jell using the trees and you may ask why not just like i dont know stick the hands in th eblue jell o why use the trees well because we needed something long so that the giant hands dont touch the jell they're allergic and stop lookingat me like im insane I told you that earlier.....
(allie took over here not that she wasn't helping there)
Once we mix the blue jello we will take over a news station take cnn for example and then announce to everyone our evil scheme you know how the bad guy tells his arch nemesis the evil scheme while he waits for the countdown clock on the bomb the hero is tied to a chaioir but while the evil guy tells about it the hero escapes oh crap!!! but this time all we will succeed in doing is send ing th epublic into mass hysteria!!!!!!!! phew I just thought I deleted all that that would be horrible....
Then we shall flood the world hahahahahahahahaha MWHAHAHAHAHA hope you like blue world
now over to Lauren
So it would be depressing if you didn't like blue but we can fix that we will charge peopl and then our heard of man-eating trained elephants will go around and suck up the blue jello with their trunks and spray it all over the world's abortion centers!!!!!!1 because they are evil
then we will go and get an enormous cna of white spray paint and spray paint the whit ehouse in the US white because it cnat be known
as the white house if its blue so it will soon be white again
(allie) most definitely
(lauren) hey i wasn't done yet
(allie) fine grumpy!!!!!!
(Lauren) yah so thanks for the input allie...now lets continue
Now you ask what do we do with the TV station we took well we will be airing a 24/7 program that stars us and is hilarious of course and then we will be rich and famous and we will use our power and money to buy off other tv stationas and we will then play hypnotic music on them so that everyone will be hypnotised to obey the rules and then our robots will make sure everyone follows our rules which are displayed below!!!!!!!
1. No doing the macaranea it reminds me too much of Draco Malffoy thanks ever so much allie
2. You must eat carrots and macoroni and chees for thanksgiving dinner because turkey is overrated and I like orange
3. you have to get a TV and wathc our show every night
4. the cosmetics industry makes millions off people trying to look pretty when they already are so no make up allowed ever unless tyler is wearing because if I dont say that she will hit me!!!
5. If you're in jail you obviously did something horrible so I will punish you horribly see I am just punishing accordingly it will be funny for me embarrassing for you and painful haha you will do the hokey pokey on a seagull infested beach with multiple pancakes on your head and a zap collar incase oyu refuse to listen
6.Allie and I are your leaders and you are our pets get it got it good!!!!
7.Tyler will be the official slave of Allie and Lauren even though I dont appprove of slavery so I will gived her umm I dont know the head of shopping industries she buys things for me but she still has to hand feed me grapes and seh cannot buy food she has to dumpster dive for it ...I will give her a never ending credit card to shop with but you cannot buy food with it, weapons, or pay people to buy you a weapon, and no stealing weapons tyler and that is why yoou should not have hit Lauren
8. Jasper Hale will be tyler's official boy friend (because she said so I guess???? hmmm she also sadi japer Cullen but since he doesn't exist she cna have the second option) Tyler must also crack eggs over Alice Cullens head unexpectdly theres your tip off alice keep a sharp eye on the future!!!!!!!!
10/ Harry Potter is supreme ruler of Australia
11. Gossip magazines are illegal anyone found with one will be sent to live on the moon
12. every child in the world only has to go to school for twenty minutes they mnust then spend the rest of the day running laps around the track what if there was an angry gorilla chasiing you and you were too slow so i will help you with that
13. homework is illegal
14. grades are overrated
15. anyone caught giving homework shall be scentenced to pancake treatment
16. everyone even the guys are required to read twilight harry potter and percy jackson and th eoolympians
17. I think tyler will find this one funny NO DUMPSTER DIVING alllowed
18. No teachers shall be allowed to call the vacation in decemebr holiday vacation it IS CHRISTMAS VACATION AND IT ALWAYS WILL BE no one is going to be offended if you call it christmas break
19. the worl will no longer be known as earth it is officially Laurne is awesomeness
(allie) hey why cant it be allie is awesomeness
(lauren) because we all know that I am awesomer than you!!!!!! You can rename pluto Ill send NASA an email as soon as I am done here
20. the moon shall be painted blue that way the phrase once in a blue moon will be funny and pointless the perfect combination...
21.Movie tickets are officially free
22. Lauren will be allowed ot watch twilight any day she wants
23. anyone caught giving tyler food will also suffer ppancake treatment
Soooo in the end Allie and I will be the supreme ruler of the world and CEO(s) of Evil Incorporated Allie and Lauren Style th eway evil should be
tyler will eb fooodless
and the world will be blue but jello-less
TUNE IN ENXT WEKK for how lauren and allie plan to annoy someone and colonize the moon
bye for now have an evil day and rememebr
Wednesday is Scheming Day
CEO(s) of Evil Incorporated Lauren and Allie style the way evil should be!!!!!!!!
MOST DEFINITELY!!!!
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